With Purpose Success, part 57

By the time you reach forty-six or fifty-two or sixty-six even most marriages could benefit from some refreshing. I have my own special way of doing that, which I'll share near the end of this chapter. For now, let me just say that if you put in the time it'll be worth it. Make the call. Send the e-mail. Extend the invite. You might be surprised at how rewarding it can be to reinvigorate not just your marriage but also other family ties and old friendships. Bonds forged many years ago are truly special. At one time, these were dear people in your life. Whatever happened since then doesn't matter. If your house was on fire it's their pictures and the mementos of them that you would grab. 

But as important as those relationships are-especially the one you share with your spouse-it is the not-yet-made relationship that has the power to be most transforming. With family and old friends you enjoy familiarity, and that may foster comfort and trust. These are vital relationships. 

Take especially good care of them. But don't stop there. Don't be content with the relationships you already have because there is no promise greater than the one built into a new encounter. 

New relationships come with uncertainty-but also excitement. They arouse your curiosity and sense of exploration. It is critical that you keep surrounding yourself with fun and interesting people who can help you discover and be what you want to be. I'm not saying your spouse and family can't help. Your husband or wife knows you best. Their understanding is definitely important. But nurturing and restocking your network of close friends is critical to the self-discovery and personal growth that will lead you down the road of higher purpose in the years ahead. 

In the past few decades we have become increasingly isolated. Studies show that the number of confidants each of us can truthfully claim has dwindled from four to just one or two. That's not enough. Too few friends is limiting. You have the capacity to handle more without sacrificing anything in your marriage and family, and each one of your close relationships will fill you up in unforeseen ways. You owe it to yourself to keep opening doors. This isn't a popularity contest. You're not trying to register the most "friends" on Facebook. So don't overdo it. Experts say that four is a good start. Six or eight is better. Ten could stretch you too thin. 

Great Partners, Great Results

How important are close relationships? History is full of examples of greatness that was only achieved through partnership-Laurel and 

Hardy, Martin and Lewis, Abbott and Costello, Lucy and Ricky, Rogers and Hammerstein, Lennon and McCartney, Ginger and Fred, Gates and 

Allen, Ben and Jerry, Antony and Cleopatra, Lewis and Clark, Bonnie and Clyde, Pocahontas and John Smith, Roosevelt and Churchill. 

These partnerships all surpassed what any of the individuals could have achieved on their own. "If we are together nothing is impossible. 

If we are divided all will fail," noted Winston Churchill. This human condition may be why so many important decisions in society are left to groups. For example, our laws are made by hundreds of politicians who were elected by millions of people. The Supreme Court rules by committee, as do juries. Central banks from the United States to Europe to Asia set interest rates via a majority vote. "Every prince needs allies," said Italian 

Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi, "and the bigger the responsibility, the more allies he needs."