With Purpose Success, part 85

He argues that "every act of goodness toward another person is a combination of altruism and self interest." Still, there are those rare people who willingly give without regard for themselves. Consider Wesley Autrey, the construction worker who was christened the "Subway Superman" after his split-second decision to dive onto the train tracks in Harlem and rescue nineteen-year-old Cameron Hollopeter, who had stumbled in front of a train. As Autrey lay on top of Hollopeter, holding him in place, a train roared overhead so close that it left grease on his cap. Autrey said later: "I don't feel like I did something spectacular; I just saw someone who needed help. I did what I felt was right." That was Autrey's reward- he felt good about doing what was right. 

I can't resist pointing out that Autrey's act of unusual selflessness paid off in very material, yet unexpected, ways. He received: $5,000 in cash for him and $5,000 in scholarships for his daughters from the New York 

Film Academy, where Hollopeter was a student; $10,000 from Donald Trump; a $5,000 Gap gift card; tickets and backstage passes to a Beyonce concert; season tickets to the New Jersey Nets and a signed jersey from Nets star Jason Kidd; a new Jeep Patriot and two years of car insurance from Progressive; a one-year free parking pass for use anywhere in 

New York City; new computers for his daughters every three years until they graduate high school; a year of free subway rides; and a weeklong trip to Disney World and tickets to see The Lion King on Broadway. Finally, 

Mayor Michael Bloomberg presented Autrey with the Bronze Medallion, New York City's highest award for exceptional citizenship. Said the mayor: "Wesley's astonishing bravery-saving a life in the face of an oncoming subway car-is an inspiration not just to New Yorkers, but the entire world." 

Do the rewards of altruism often bear such tangible fruit? Of course not. Do good Samaritans anticipate payback before helping others? Probably not. But that's not what giving is all about. If you do it for the right reasons, it usually comes back to you somehow. It just does. 

Make a Difference. When you really dig into why people give it's pretty simple most of the time. They want to bring some sense of meaning into their lives by making a difference to someone someplace in the world in some small or large way. In an AARP survey of people forty-five and older, half of all respondents called making a difference "a very important reason" to volunteer or donate money. Making a difference, especially one you can see, feels good. That's why Sir Tom quit sending out checks for causes he was unfamiliar with. It was unfulfilling. 

Most people looking to make a difference try to tie their efforts into a cause near their heart. Think about Augie and Lynn Nieto again. Their drive to search for a cure for Lou Gehrig's disease started when Augie was crushed with the illness. It's not uncommon for the families of cancer victims to adopt cancer research as their pet cause. Maybe you know a battered or abused victim and want to fight for tougher laws, or have seen school kids sharing books in poor school districts and want to lead a book drive. If you are searching for a place to make a difference, the first things any good charity or wealth adviser will ask you are, "What have you seen that bothers you? What would you like to fix? What do you care about?" 

When you can answer those questions, I assure you that you'll be able to find related organizations in need of your time and talent, or money. 

With Purpose Success, part 84

Exactly why and how people choose to give is a complex equation. But it's clear that giving can be very, very good for you-so good for you, in fact, that through time philosophers and others have wondered if giving might not just be among the most selfish of all acts! De Tocqueville, for one, described philanthropy as "self-interest, rightly understood." The Chinese 

Zen master Chuang-Tzu as far back as the fourth century bc, argued that most philanthropy is meant to further one's personal, business, or social agenda. Philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche (who viewed charity as demeaning to the recipient) worried that people of wealth exerted too much control over society through charity that mostly furthered their own interests. Scandals erupted in England in the 1950s over the tax- exempt status of mammoth charitable foundations run by families like the Wellcomes and Nuffields. 

Philosophical questions linger today. Would the public missions that philanthropists take on be better left to government? When Bill Gates directs his foundation to buy millions of computers for public libraries in poor neighborhoods is he being generous, or furthering his own business interests? Theologian Reinhold Niebuhr cynically summed up such concerns like this: "The effort to make voluntary charity solve the prob lems of a major social crisis results only in monumental hypocrisies, and tempts selfish people to regard themselves as unselfish." 

I readily concede that there is a selfish element to giving. Yet, to me, it seems silly to attack generous acts on that level, especially in the realm of 

Everymanthropy, where what you give most of is your time and energy.

So what if you get something back for your efforts? Doesn't that just lead you down the path of more giving? Embrace the rewards. It's OK. Generally, these rewards can be lumped into eight basic categories. You may experience all of them, or just one or two. At some level, though, when you give it's because you seek to gain one or more of the following eight benefits: 

Do the Right Thing. The highest level of giving is altruism, generally defined as an unselfish act for the welfare of others without regard for oneself. 

Altruism is a core teaching in most of the religions of the world. In the Jewish Torah and Christian Gospels, for example, there are many references to loving your neighbor as you love yourself. Yet, unfortunately, true altruism is extremely rare. Even people of faith will admit that in treating their neighbors as they would treat themselves they hope to gain everlasting benefits-like, say, entry into heaven, which is no trifle. 

Dwight Burlingame, professor of philanthropy at Indiana University, has said, "It is nearly impossible for someone to act with pure altruism." 

With Purpose Success, part 83

House number 1 was proceeding so fast that by the third day all eyes were on us. I was fascinated that our pace was being driven by an "old" man who said so very little. It became clear to me that Carter's leadership style did not involve barking at people or being critical, but making everybody on the site want to work to keep pace with him. 

Wade and Shalina Gibson, the young couple who with their three children were going to live in the house, worked with us. You could see it dawning on this low-income African-American couple that they were soon going to have their own house, and that it was being built by a former president! While on the site I liked to ask my fellow volunteers why they were taking part in the build. Almost everybody had the same answer: They didn't feel whole inside unless they took some time to help others. And for this group it wasn't about writing a check; it was about giving a chunk of their life. 

By twilight on the fourth day, we were laying sod and planting trees, then finally installing carpets and appliances, and at 3:30 pm on Friday- right on schedule-we were finished. President and Mrs. Carter brought us inside the house for a ceremony, and as our group of forty coworkers and new friends stood together in a circle holding hands it hit everyone pretty much at once that we had just done a wonderful thing. 

Exhausted and filthy but with full hearts, we huddled as President Carter said a prayer and turned to Wade and Shalina and gave them a white linen-covered Bible-the first book for their first house. The gesture was so powerful; the emotional intensity in the room went up a notch, if that was possible. "Do you know what Jesus did as a young man?" President Carter asked. "He was a carpenter; he worked with his hands. By allowing us to build your house, in a small way you've allowed us to do the work of the 

Lord." Although three hundred pounds of muscle, Wade started to cry like a baby, as did Shalina. Pretty soon we were all crying. It didn't even matter what particular religion any of us subscribed to-the feelings we all shared were deeply spiritual 

Before our group broke up President Carter urged all of us who are fortunate in life to never forget those who are not. He spoke of the blessing of giving, how the harder he and Mrs. Carter work the more blessed they feel by the results. 

I just find Carter's thinking on the subject so compelling that it bears frequent mention. Giving of himself, the president has told me, makes him stronger. "Every time we thought we were making a sacrifice for others, it has turned out to be one of our greatest blessings," he said. "In other words; we have gotten more out of it than we have put into it. 

You just try it, even if it's nothing more than going to a public hospital and rocking a baby for two hours a week. It's an expansion of life, an encounter with new people who are potentially friends. And so, it's a learning process, an exciting process that gives new and expanding life experiences." 

What We Get When We Give

With Purpose Success, part 82

For me giving is both routine, and it is not. That is, I'm always searching for the next way to contribute a little something-yet I have a few special causes or steady habits that I stay with year after year. This keeps the mix varied, my options their widest, and allows me to keep learning about new things and meeting new people. At this point in my life (I'm approaching sixty), I don't yet have as much time as I'd like for giving back. Not yet retired (of course I may never retire), my central focus is still my career and my family. But now that Maddy and I have just become empty nesters, we can envision expanding our volunteer efforts in our personal quests to find purpose by doing things for others. And in a few years, I think I'd like to cut back my workload to about 50 percent -providing even more time to do all sorts of new things with my time and with my life. Lots of us are in this phase of life, and it sure doesn't hurt to start thinking now about the possibilities for when that day arrives and you have a little-or, conceivably, quite a lot of-extra time. 

A Dear Old Friend-and Role Model 

I briefly mentioned my affection for Habitat for Humanity. Let me explain where it comes from. A few years ago I went to Houston to take part in Jimmy Carter's signature annual home-building project. The experience was unusual in ways that I would never have imagined. I'd gotten the idea to join the Habitat build through my meetings with President 

Carter in Atlanta, where he had invited me to help him brainstorm the topics for his The Virtues of Aging book. 

It was a steaming Sunday in early June when Maddy and I arrived alongside some five thousand other volunteers. I was naturally anxious; other than a bookshelf or two I had never built a thing with wood. 

During the orientation that day we learned that the plan was to build a hundred houses in just five days. There would be about forty people on each house. The rest-some one thousand volunteers-would cook meals, run errands, and haul trash. 

President Carter respectfully reminded everyone that he was there to work, not to socialize, and it soon became apparent that he meant it when he told the gathering, "I have a job to do." Like all of the volunteers, 

I had brought my own tools and paid a $250 fee to be part of this unusual experience. Each house had four adept crew leaders, ten to fifteen construction pros, around ten somewhat handy volunteers, and another ten or so folks who were like me-pretty much unsure which side of the hammer to hold. 

Anyway, we showed up at 6:30 am on Monday and Maddy and I were thrilled to learn that we'd be working on house number 1 with Jimmy and 

Rosalyn Carter. Our team gathered in a circle. President Carter offered a short prayer and we got to work. Early in the morning it was already so hot and humid, within an hour I felt like I was going to have a stroke. But 

I put my discomfort aside and joined the torrent of hammering, lifting, and nailing that had commenced. Remarkably, near sunset the entire frame was in place. I, however, was ready to go AWOL. It was now over a hundred degrees, and my arm ached from swinging a hammer all day. I glanced at the seventy-something former president. He was banging away like a pro, and I wondered how long he could keep it up. 

After another work break, I was spent. But the president was still pounding away. First thing the next morning, we had a lot of wood that needed cutting. But with only two power saws on the site, some would have to be cut with a handsaw. You guessed it-President Carter stepped up and had hand-cut twenty two-by-fours in the time it took me to cut ten. By 4:30 pm of the second day, the crew was spent. Nearly all my fingers were damaged and bleeding. Carter kept right on toiling, well past the dinner hour. 

With Purpose Success, part 81

You don't have to soullessly give on command at the office, or only support your place of worship. The nonprofit world teems with organizations that can use your donations of time or money for specific purposes that you care about. We're way past the days of large charitable organizations with mostly soup-kitchen roles to offer. Such volunteers are still needed, of course, and quite valuable. But you might get a lot more out of dreaming up a charity's new slogan or rescuing injured wildlife in the mountains-or using your business skills to make an organization run more efficiently. 

In the Dychtwald house we give in various ways, and much of it is so enjoyable that we don't think about what we're doing as a service to others. My wife, Maddy, contributes untold hours at school. She coordinates team dinners, supervises training sessions, and has driven a lot of other parents' kids along with our son to distant water polo matches. 

Maddy and I also mentor students learning to speak in public, and we judge school speaking tournaments. Some folks might call such gratis efforts a chore. The hours certainly can stack up. But we love watching all the kids interact and grow, and making new friends. We do it mainly for the joy it brings to us. 

The afterglow from helping a person or an organization that benefits from our contribution is a wonderful payoff. Although psychology and gerontology have been my fields of study, public speaking about these topics has been a big part of my livelihood. It's terrific and satisfying work. But it's not easy. There's a lot of preparation that goes into my presentations that no one but me sees. Still there are some groups that I just want to help at no charge because I'm interested in contributing to their mission or their future. For example, some years ago, I volunteered to help the Alzheimer's Association devise a new marketing strategy. That was work. But it gave me a great chance to make use of something I know a bit about for a cause that had captured my attention. I always keep some of my personal bandwidth in reserve for that kind of thing. Volunteering shakes me out of my rut and lets me express myself in ways that don't happen at the office. Everyone has skills and causes that speak to them. 

What are yours?

With Purpose Success, part 80

An interesting thing about Hunter is that when he got jazzed about philanthropy it reignited sparks in other parts of his life too. He redoubled efforts in his profit-minded investment firm, seeing the profits he would be earning there as a means to further his philanthropic ventures. "What I'm doing now is a bigger buzz than any business deal," Hunter says. "When we help farmers in Rwanda get a better price for their coffee, it's their success-not ours. We are just a catalyst. But you can see the results. When a farmer one year can barely feed himself and the next year he can feed himself and his family and take care of his kids because of something you did-that's a hell of a thing." 

Yes it is-a better-than-business buzz that Sir Tom playfully but earnestly chides Warren Buffett for missing out on. Are you missing out too? "Listen," Hunter says, "I'm not someone who wants to preach to anybody else and say you should do what I do. I just feel a bit sorry for those who don't give something back because they're missing out on the best fun of their life." 

Giving Isn't a Chore 

Forget for a moment that Sir Tom is a billionaire. The epiphany he experienced was real, and you can experience it too. You don't need boatloads of dollars. You just need time, desire, and compassion, and you may never have those things in greater abundance than you do right now. Perhaps your kids have moved out, or soon will. You are staring down the road at your empty-nest years, relieved of many family responsibilities. Retirement- or partial retirement-might beckon you. You are no doubt eager to explore the vast leisure opportunities before you. But you have the time and personal abilities to devote to a higher purpose too, and however you choose to give back you can be sure that in one way or another you'll get as much as you give. 

Don't undervalue the skills and connections that have come to you through your life experiences. Not everybody knows how to weld a pipe, run a procurement division, write a press release, raise money, give an injection, pilot a plane, interpret law, teach a class, organize a brainstorming meeting or fix a computer. Someone out there can benefit from what you know, and it can be a blast passing it on. Your personal skills and assets can help you launch out in new and exciting directions. Now is the time to step up and rethink how you want your life to function, and how you might fit service to others into it. You can choose how and when. You may choose to become a vacateer, mixing fun and adventure with personal fulfillment. Why not skip Club Med this year and sign up the whole family for a virtuous vacation with Habitat for Humanity? It's tough to connect with your kids these days, and you may just find that this kind of time is the most rewarding experience of your life. 

Giving isn't like a spoonful of castor oil, that notoriously ghastly cure- all that was so hard to swallow that TV's Little Rascals-Spanky, Buckwheat, 

Darla, Froggy, and the gang-were always comically scheming to avoid their dose. The horrible taste certainly loaned credibility to castor oil's perceived medicinal value. Anything that bad must be good for you, right? Well, too many people view giving the same way: the right thing to do, but painful. It doesn't have to be that way. 

With Purpose Success, part 79

Those pithy words hit Hunter like a bolt of lightning. After many long and intimate discussions with his wife Marion about what they might possibly do with the rest of their lives, they both began to feel energized by the idea of working as hard and as smart at giving their money away as they had worked to make it in the first place-for the betterment of others and their own fulfillment. 

To better understand the challenge in front of him, Sir Tom met in New York with the head of the Carnegie Foundation, Vartan Gregorian, who urged Hunter and his wife, Marion, to think about what they wanted to accomplish. Gregorian also gave Hunter a whole new way to think about his wealth. "He challenged me," Hunter says. "He said it wasn't really my money; I just held it in trust for the common good. That was a big shock for a Scotsman-being told my money wasn't actually mine." 

Hunter took those words to heart, though, and in 2007 announced that before he died he would give all of his money away. One of his principal benefactors so far has been the Scottish educational system, which in his view needs a dramatic overhaul to prepare students for draconian changes in the Scottish economy. Sir Tom became determined to introduce enterprise and entrepreneurship into school curriculums to prepare the nation's youth for the information-based world they would graduate to. He invested in pilot school programs that proved so successful that the government agreed to adopt and fund them. 

Hunter has other acclaimed philanthropic interests as well. For example, he is investing $100+ million in Africa through partnerships with the Clinton Foundation, UNICEF, and others. He mobilized popular support for aid to Africa and is committed to sparking substantial and sustainable economic growth there, beginning in Rwanda and Malawi, where governments have pledged their full support for his programs. 

Hunter's mission, in concert with the Clinton Foundation, is to develop programs that produce profits from agriculture and provide greater access for the poor to better nutrition and health care and clean water. In one year his efforts helped Rwandan farmers increase their crop yield by 240 percent. 

What's most fascinating and exemplary about Hunter is that while he has worked so hard to make his fortune, he doesn't simply want to give it away. Instead, he approaches all of his giving as an investment-not charity. 

He sets goals and demands measurable results, much like running a for-profit company. He says he would have cut off funding for his Scottish education initiatives had they not shown demonstrable progress. In this way, he embodies the new breed of twenty-first-century philanthropreneur, who seeks social change through targeted investments in people. 

You can be a philanthropreneur too-for as little as $25-through innovative organizations like kiva.org and microplace.com, which fund third world business start-ups. I'll talk more about those in chapter 7.